My Letter Series – Dear Xi, Let’s Now Lay A Claim On Alaska

Dear Xi, let’s ensure the world remembers your name just like they do Hitler, Mussolini and other dictators! Heil Xi!!!

First of all, I am your biggest fan! How can one not be a fan?? You have the stones to claim any territory, whether it’s in your neck of the woods or not, and are ready to prove it belongs to you. It started way back in 1962, when you decided Kashmir was a part of China, not just the area of Ladakh. At the time, India had a coward Prime Minister who didn’t want to fight. Au contraire, he was happy to keep whatever you left behind, akin to a hyena eating the scraps left behind by a lion. Over the next few decades, while the brave Indian forces did show their might, the political leadership showed a lack of resistance.

When 2020 rolled around, you figured the new Prime Minister would do a similar roll over and play dead, but that didn’t happen! It wasn’t your fault; too many of the past leaders had shown a lack of intestinal fortitude that you automatically assumed was an inherent Indian characteristic. When the new Prime Minister showed he would face you, you were, understandably, lost! When he pushed your people back, that was something that had never happened! When your soldiers justifiably killed 20 of his soldiers, to kill 40 of your innocent soldiers was totally uncalled for!!! After all, a country that till 6 years ago believed in non-violence was now becoming violent!! The person they call the Father of The Nation was a person who believed in pacifism and here, the new head honcho was as violent as they come!!!

Xi-ster, France and other EU countries selling weapons to India, to counter you!!! Hah! Do they know that the great Chinese war machine could wipe out these pathetic countries in one swoop!

If that wasn’t enough, the new Prime Minister had the gall to instigate the rest of the world to oppose the wonderful Chinese Communist Party (CCP). To get a few countries like America, Japan, Australia and a few others together to cry foul against your country’s attempt to integrate the world and make the world one, instead of different countries!! How dare they!! Don’t they understand the importance of becoming one single entity, with the leadership being provided by you and the rest of the CCP? To top it all, to instigate Taiwan, who you’ve treated like your own (step) son!!! Next, they’d be doing the same thing with Hong Kong!!!

To be made to sit with the people from Pakistan, Turkey, Malaysia and Iran!!! Really? Your country should be sitting with the big boys (and girls) and here you are, sitting with the Turkey, Malaysia, Iran and Pakistan!! Really, is this what the rest of the world thinks of you? Making you sit with people who are intellectually so inferior, it would take them a few centuries to even come close to you; the same people, that made you sit with this ridiculous group, made India sit with them!!! But, one good thing came out of this group – you have now found a new lap dog in Pakistan! They will jump, thro’, hoops and burn themselves to keep you happy! Nothing wrong with that! Can anyone of those other countries show such following?

Where your products were showing the same excellent quality that Japanese and German products showed, people around the world were busy making fun of these products made in your wonderful, democratic land. So what if a few of them were defective? North Korea never complained about your products!! How come, the rest of the world complains?? The sheep, I mean, the people in your country have never had a problem with any of the products that you have requested the rest of the world to use! The people from your country have accepted your products and are so ecstatic about the quality, they keep buying the same product every couple of weeks!!

Xi-ster, France and other EU countries selling weapons to India, to counter you!!! Hah! Do they know that the great Chinese war machine could wipe out these pathetic countries in one swoop! And yet, they want to counter you and your formidable forces??? Who do these countries think they are? America or India? Even Russia listens to you and these countries want to take you on? Okay, you’d suffer a little economically but you’d still be able to sell your products to the group that you were made to sit with!! Ok, you’d have to loan these countries money in order to be able to buy the products you intend to con them, I mean, sell to them. If they can’t repay this soft loan, after all the interest rates are a manageable 6.5%, then you get to take over that country and integrate them into your grand scheme! Once integrated, they’d understand the impressive ways of the CCP!

Already, your lapdog’s Prime Minister is studying up on all the Chinese words he can impress you with! Just a word of caution, don’t hold your breath waiting for him to impress you! He’s finding it difficult to stitch a few words together to say to the US President, Donald Trump. All he could muster was “you have to help us” even after the Don had told him he’d help ONLY if both sides agreed. Want to know a funny thing, Xi? The people from that country thought he’d made a great visit to the USA, without even realizing what the Trump-Man had told him!! You probably will have to train the guy prior to making him sit on your lap!

Xi-Man, you’ve got to get back at the rest of the world. Let’s see how they fare without Chinese products. Stop exporting anything to any of the countries around the globe and let’s see how their economies crash! That’ll teach them not to mess with your production lines!! You make better copies of the iPhone than Apple does, and you can sell them for a pittance. Let’s see how people manage phones and other necessary items made in India and other countries? That should teach the world how important your country is to their economy!

We need to now lay a claim on Alaska! It used to be a part of the USSR, so we can always say it was stolen from China! Whether anyone believes it or not, once we win the war against the USA, we can revise history! After all, history is written by the winners! Does the world really know what happened in Vietnam or Korea? You did a good job hiding the tortures, rapes and killings!! See my point? Good. Let’s try to invade the USA. So what if there’s a mismatch in the number of bases the USA has as opposed to the one base we have, in Djibouti? Even if we lose, who can blame China? See my point again? Good because I seem to be confused and don’t see my point! Anyways, Xi: let’s ensure the world remembers your name just like they do Adolf Hitler, Mussolini and other dictators! Heil Xi!!!

जय श्रीराम। जय सीयाराम। उत्तिष्ठ भारत। जय माँ भारती

God Bless the USA.

Note:
1. The views expressed here are those of the author and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of PGurus.