My New Letter Series – Dear Pakistani People, Make Up Your Mind!!

Dear Pakistanis, it has been a pleasure bringing you back to reality and bursting that bubble all y’all seem to live in

May 30, 2024

Dear Pakistani People,

Well, listening to some of you on, my favorite news outlet, YouTube, I hear some of you blaming the British for conspiring to create your country! So, Jinnah was a conspirator too?? If the British conspired, they needed someone to conspire with, from your side, in order to create Pakistan. That would make ole JinJin a co-conspirator too wouldn’t it? All they needed was to supply him with a never-ending supply of Scotch and pork chops and he would agree to anything the British wanted!

Reality and your people are so far apart, that it’s not even funny anymore. As an example, people from India want to mingle with people from Pakistan.

Indians and I count myself as one of them even though I live far away from India, do NOT carry any love for you people. Sorry, we love our parents, our sisters, brothers, relatives and, oh how could I forget, our pets. We also love that cutie pie who lives in that house at the corner of the street with a Hitler for a dad!! But, I digress. However, HELL NO! We don’t have any such feelings for terrorists, and that’s what ALL Y’ALL are! Loving you would be called Stockholm Syndrome (look up the word in Google rather than the latest animal porn).

If you think the overwhelming majority of Indians want to cross the borders to exchange a “झप्पी ”, (hug) you’re sadly mistaken. We have a pretty extensive list and you PROBABLY feature at the very bottom of that list, just after tongue-kissing a snake.

PLEASE DO NOT BE UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT INDIA WANTS YOU BACK!! Some idiots, from your esteemed country, claim that India wants Akhand Bharat. That too, IS a response to your Ghazwa E Hind! By the way, some of you claim this was written in the HOLIEST OF HOLY BOOKS! Please show me where it’s written. It ain’t there folks!! It’s in some subscript of this book called a Hadith!! Each “historian” has HIS version of the holiest of holy books and can basically say anything HE wants to say. All he has to do is to attribute this to their prophet!!

Of late, the idiot minister in charge of your finances has been asking for the reopening of trade with India. Before we go to the topic of trade, I want to understand WHAT this man’s job is and how much he gets paid for this job. I mean, this has got to be an honorary title, given a small technical issue! What is that issue, you ask? THERE IS NO FINANCE NOR MONEY IN YOUR COUNTRY!! Getting to the trade aspect, Immi, the idiot wanted to shut down trade. Not that it made any difference to India’s economy. For good reason too! You see, your pharmaceutical companies have STILL NOT PAID for the drugs sold to you previously. You also must have realized business schools teach you idealistic situations but there is one thing that they don’t teach you only because it’s common sense. Fool me once, shame on you..fool me twice, shame on me!!! Your pharmaceuticals owe Indian companies over 400 million USD! From previous transactions that are yet to be paid for!! Do you really think these companies would give you even the time of the day till they receive their WAY PAST DUES??? Then to ask India to open trade with you? Why? India, and Indians, are happy without you. What gives you the impression that they’re eagerly waiting to do “business “ with you? I’m being very generous when I say “do business” because there’s really nothing you have that interests Indians!! And what interests Indians is something you absolutely don’t have! Unfortunately, for most Pakistanis, this translates to money! It stands to reason that one yearns for what one doesn’t have at all! A person walking miles yearns for a vehicle, someone hungry yearns for food and it goes on. The Pakistanis yearn for all that I mentioned. However, most (MOST) Indians are interested in respect. We respect our teachers, even though they might now be living in abject poverty. We don’t compare our networth with that of our teachers. After all, our networth is a result of our teachers and their hard work. Before someone pounces on me, nowhere am I saying the student didn’t work. The two go hand in hand. On the other hand, students from YOUR esteemed MITJANA (Maulana Institute of Technology, Journalism And Nuclear Appliances) live in luxury, making 3 million PKR (about $3) and their teachers live in luxury, bordering on obscenity (literally and figuratively).

Anyway, it has been a pleasure bringing you back to reality and bursting that bubble all y’all seem to live in. If you heard a big bang, that was just the bubble blowing and not a bomb! What am I saying, you probably know how a bomb sounds, better than most people do! Anyways, welcome back to reality. It sucks but it is what it is!!!

For all the latest updates, download PGurus App.